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My Varied Laws


My Varied Laws
Dinesh K Kapila
Kapila’s Law of Gardening
On a hot day when you water the lawns, the probability of sudden rain or thundershowers within 12 hours goes up by 70 %.
Kapila’s Law of Walking
When you are out walking, with clouds yet to build up overhead, always remember distant thundering clouds are only to mislead us. If you don’t believe this, then be ready to be wet to the bones.
Kapila on Trees to shelter from the rain
When you hide under a tree to take shelter from the rain, you will still get wet. Only gradually rather than suddenly. The choice is yours.
Kapila’s Law of Offices – Lean Periods
Actually there is no lean period. When you feel there is a lean period and sit back to relax and take it easy, multiple tasks or a mini crisis will soon descend upon you.  Or God Forbid, a Video Conference.
Kapila’s Law of Good Looking Women at Airports
It’s a fact. If a good looking lady enters an airport at the same time as you did, has the security check at the same time as you did, then she is boarding another flight. And if she boards the same flight, then she is seated in a different class. 
Kapila’s Law of Video Conferences
It’s the day when you are least prepared with inputs or progress on a subject that a VC will occur, more so, the focus could well be your work and top guns would be reviewing.
Kapila’s Law of Buttons
The Button never ever chooses to fall off at home. It falls off at the office or at a party only.   
Kapila’s Law of Shoes
Don’t buy two shoes of the same brand and type, even after some gap, even if you like them too much. After some time confusion is automatic about which shoe in which pair.
Kapila’s Law of looking at pretty women when the wife is around.
She knows, period. Always.
Kapila’s Law of Ties.
The right length, the more late you are, the more mistakes you make. And the wife and daughter  always know better the right colour and brand for you.
Kapila’s Law of Beer Brands to serve at a Party.
Easy, Start with the brands the guests like, if you run short (and they have had a few), then any damn brand will do. Just keep serving.

Kapila’s Law of Stock Markets
The stock you just sold at a loss is the stock which will then gain momentum.
Kapila’s Law on the Best Fiction.
On Financial channels. Consistently. They beat all novels hollow. There is always an explanation, belated, convoluted, twisted, for every movement or change.  
Kapila’s Law of Baba’s (Self Styled Heads)
The cause of many a fight (or even divorce) within families. Pray directly to the One Above, why follow a Baba on Earth blindly.  However the Baba normally wins.   
Kapila’s Law of Handbags
They have gone nuts. The pricier, the better. And obviously the richer you are. Each square inch could cost a bar of silver. But now a days ladies notice first the clutch or the bag and then the rest of the carefully put together get up. On each other.
Kapila’s Law of the Newspaper.  
The main lead and sensation on the first page. The real news and developments placed in the last few sections. In between at times anything goes.
Kapila’s Law of Indian News Channels.  
News, what news, news is for the stringers. They are the Indian Views Channels. Studio Based, cost effective, investors happy, advertisers happier,  the viewers helpless.
Kapila’s Law of Dieting and Clothes.
Don’t throw away the older trousers and shirts. Store them for when you bounce back. Permanent victories are rare.
Kapila’s Law of Ghosts and the Unseen Presence.  
The lonelier the hotel floor or the locality, the more the chances of a ghost causing a door or a window to creak.
Kapila’s Law of Hospitals or Doctors.
Blood Pressure or Sugar Levels or the feeling of dread tend to rise in proportion to the level of the complexity of the test being administered.
Kapila’s Law of Walking Fast.
Find a guy who is walking fast. Then follow him closely. He will walk faster and so will you.   And the pretty girl who is walking very fast, well she will certainly cross you and walk away. Don’t compete. It’s useless to even try.  
Kapila’s Law of Plumbers and Electricians.
Add 20 % to any estimate for maintenance or major repair. And add  a minimum two days to any timeline for completion.
Kapila's Law of Recalling Old School Mates
This applies to the guys. In any given scenario, at any reunion, specially virtual, in the recall of school mates, specially girls, by the guys of that time,  the dainty and the prettier ones are recalled first.  



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