TALES CAFES JUST DON'T TELL YOU

 Tales Cafes just don’t tell you !

Dinesh K Kapila

Chandigarh has a vibrant café culture. In fact the tri city has evolved on this, even if the cafes are rather overpriced at times. They are reasonably full, packed on weekends and give off a strong vibrant feel. The aroma of freshly brewed coffee entices most people in any case as you walk by. Youngsters working away on their laptops oblivious to the world around them is a common sight as are pretty young things whiling away time. You want a dose of energy, walk into a café, specially which is more frequented.

I personally like the cafes where you get the aroma of a strongly brewed really hot cup of coffee. Not being adventurous, I stick to the lattes and cappuccinos, Starbucks does a decent version of the really hot coffee with its flat white version. I mean just what is the aim of a coffee if it runs out of that hot strong flavour in a couple of minutes.

But these cafes hide many a tale. And we really don’t get to know this really delicious juicy part of it. And that robs us of so much hidden pleasures. And by the way don’t even think about under rating the staff there, studiously neutral, they actually observe all that goes on. Who is splurging and on whom, who hardly tastes the food after ordering it, is that really his wife or a very very treasured friend, then the guy who seeks a discount or certainly will or the lady who inevitably drops names and connections with owners and then looks expectantly for a waiver or discount.

But this is just the trailer. The real happiness lies in the juicy parts. As most of us go around living our rather humdrum lives and sipping coffee, we should look around too. I was once sitting at a tony café with a friend. We were having our coffee and cribbing about the lack of variety as to the spice of life ! And cocktails but mainly the spice of life, what else could it be, India China relations !. Suddenly my friend, a retired Army Officer, sort of froze. He was sort of open mouthed in I would say the shock and awe mode !  I tried to look where he was looking while pretending to be not looking, it’s a fine art and requires practise but once perfected pays rich dividends.

Well, some three tables away, a young pretty young thing, young by my definition, smart and well dressed was sitting with a rather distinguished guy. The gentleman was well turned out, in smart casuals and definitely my age. And my friend’s age, just to be clear. Oye, whispered my friend, he is a retired Senior Army Officer, and this is the third or fourth time I have seen him at a café or restaurant. Just in the past few weeks. And every time it’s a different young lady. Man, he should be ashamed, at his age, while his wife sits alone at home he continued, but yaar, how does he do it ! What makes him click , how does he manage it. What do these females see in him ! just how. A bit more of this and I butted in, now are you criticising him or actually envying him ! Then we both made rather unnecessary trips to the restroom, rather the washroom or to be very clear, the bathroom. To do that we had to pass by the couple, well, he and my friend shook hands, the concerned guy was clearly unfazed but did not introduce us ! She was ok to look at, the senior retired guy was clearly at ease, and that was it. 

Then there is an exalted  species. Or the August black robes variety. Whispers are always there when someone look around for a diversion from the multiple interpretations of laws and its pressures. There are no secrets but they are never talked about, you just know ! its always confidential, its honestly one confidential whisper setting off a chain of confidential whispers. This travels rather fast. One worthy doing well at the Bar has his wife stay in one place and his mistress in another, so goes the confidential whisper. But back to the cafes. As goes the story, His Lordship had a mistress on the side while in service. Post retirement it continues, the wife sits at home while he at times is seen in rather quiet cafes engrossed in conversation over a coffee. People see but pretend they do not see. I just love this sense of discretion. 

But what takes the cake is what a well to do businessman  told me. A high end supplier of exotic produce and imported luxury items. He swears a Manager at a Café told him this. A tony café, rather sophisticated, in that huge line stretching from Sector Nine to Sector Twenty Six or so. One day, a middle aged well to do guy walked in with a sophisticated looking middle aged lady in tow. They had their coffee and titbits, sat for a long time and talked and talked and whispered and whispered and left. After taking a couple of selfies. And some snaps of each other. Nothing unusual I would say. Well, after a couple of days he was back with another smart middle aged lady. The protocol was the same as before as was the coffee. Well it happens, as many would say. Lucky guy as I would say !   No, wait, after a few days, he turns up with another smart middle aged beautiful lady, he takes many snaps, they sit around and leave. Well, a real Casanova you would say, blessed by Kamadeva or Eros, I would say. Is this the end of it, no way, read on. After a few more days, the same guy walks in with the same three ladies ! The staff were absolutely flabbergasted or I would say bewildered, really amused too. I mean, imagine the sheer boldness and swag. But wait, the real bold part is this, pretending to place the order, he walks up to the cash counter and beckons the café manager. Giving him Rs five hundred as a tip, he tells him, see that lady in the Hermes outfit, the pink one, she’s my wife. Keep it discreet and simple in service, no familiarity is to be shown by the staff. No smiles. The lady of the third day is how the staff placed her immediately.

Well long back, James Hadley Chase had written a paperback, Believe this, You will Believe Anything !!. Life can and will prove such titles are not just a marketing ploy, it does happen. There is so much more. Couples walking in with files and laptops and discussing marketing and operations and then quarrelling and leaving, old couples sitting and sipping coffee with not a word in exchange, lonesome youngsters looking to strike a conversation with just about anybody, the staff see it all. And so it goes. Before I sign off, there’s this young man, always dating at cafes, seemed to have three or four or maybe surely five girlfriends and was aways seen with one of them at a time, seemed a well to do business or executive type. Suddenly, he is heard telling his friends, I just cannot make up my mind about marriage. Its all too confusing. This decision, It makes me so afraid. I am going to tell my mom you now search the right girl for me.  I would say back to square one. Café owners, may your business only grow !

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